True Blood 2.07- "Release Me"

written by: Raelle Tucker
directed by: Michael Ruscio

Lorena is doing all the things that I want to do to Bill.

WOODS

-Andy stumbles upon the massive orgy going on in Sookie's backyard. As one does.

-In an effort to get Sam into being sacrificed, Tara licks him. 

For once I'm insanely jealous of Tara.

-Sam shifts into an owl to escape, but leaves his shirt. Where will he find another plaid shirt?!

OPENING CREDITS

ORGY(yes it's a location now)

-Terry breaks Andy's arm. *Insert lazy joke about bones in an orgy*

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH BASEMENT

-Hugo's claustrophobia is so bad he can't have his sheets tucked in. Maybe's it's because of his gout.

-The Fellowship of the Sun has their own board games!

She's no Vanna White.

-So I know it would suck (ha, ha) if Godric "met the sun", but I just don't think saving him is worth all of this trouble. Maybe if it was a character I was already emotionally invested in.

HOTEL CARMILLA

-Lorena is pretty good at backhanded compliments. She says Sookie smells "sweet and cheap."

-Lorena goes on and on about missing Bill. I cannot relate to this character at all.

LORENA FLASHBACK

-I wonder if this motherfucking book is going to be important?!

And now back to Nothing to See Here!

-Lorena brings Bill a present in the form of a choir girl and he's a real jerk about it. It's called being gracious Bill!

-Dancing seems like it was a lot easier in 1935.

-Apparently Bill has developed a conscience. Angel has both been there and done that buddy.

-Unlike Angel, who had a reason for having a conscience, this comes out completely out of left field. Ten years ago you were fucking on a dead girl. Now Lorena is the crazy one, just because you say so. It doesn't fly.

Ok, the eyebrows aren't really screaming sanity.

HOTEL CARMILLA

-Lorena finds Bill's love for Sookie "so tragic it's funny."

LIGHT OF DAY CAMP

-Fun fact: Alexander Skarsgård had a cold during this scene.

-Isabel says that part of Hugo's appeal is that humans feel more strongly than vamps. It's like me when I get off my meds. 

-"I'm not interested in Sookie and even less in how Bill Compton feels."-Amen.

Isabel knows what's up though.

-At the end of the scene, it seems like we're going to go into an Eric flashback. Sadly, we do not.

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH

-Like the gentleman that he is, Jason says that he'll go to hell instead of Sarah. How sweet of him.

-Jason immediately loses all sweetness by wanting to GTFO of his relationship with Sarah once she says she loves him. It's pretty cliche, but Jason pulls it off.

Speaking of pulling things off.

-"Let's think about this for a second. A: Steve has guns. Then there's the lockdown tomorrow night. And secondly, we're gonna be locked in this church with Steve and his guns all night."

HOTEL CARMILLA

-Hoyt and Jessica are both virgins. One of those is more surprisingly than the other.

-Jessica's "what have you done it with?" is comedy gold.

-Hoyt doesn't think anybody is a slut. Good for him.

-Hoyt thinks they're going to have sex, which is an honest mistake, because Jessica heads to bed in her bra and panties. But alas, they're just for sleeping in.

If you've got it, flaunt it?

HOTEL HALLWAY(?)

-This scene makes me realize that we haven't seen a vamp on vamp fight scene. Let's get on it True Blood staff!

-Isabel is looking pretty foxy in this episode. 

Did she borrow that leather jacket from Eric?

STACKHOUSE HOUSE OF WAYWARD TRAVELLERS

-Tara and Eggs wake up from a blackout an question everything. I've been there. Just lock yourself in the bathroom until the puking stops. 

-They suggests going sober. Now they're going to be even more boring. 

-"I'm high enough just being with you."

Lucille Bluth is my spirit animal.

-Tara tells Eggs Sookie is a telepath. Can no one keep a secret in this town?!

MERLOTTE'S BAR AND GRILL

-Sam becomes Annie and gets his gun.

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH

-Steve and Sookie have a stand off over who vampires care more about. Unlike Sookie, Steve believes everything he says.

-Steve admits that things got out of hand, but if Sookie tells him what he wants, she can have hot breakfast. I'd give him everything.

-Sookie lets it drop that Jason is her brother and Steve looks like he's had his heart broken. 

:_(

-Sookie telepaths (it's a verb now) Barry. 

HOTEL CARMILLA 

-"The bleeds have begun."-This is how I'm going to announce my period from now on.

-Bill says he won't try to rescue Sookie in the daylight, because he's not suicidal. Wasn't he staggering through a graveyard in the daylight to rescue Sookie two weeks ago. 

Yes.

-Bill believes that is all Eric's fault that Sookie is in danger. Why can't he except that people have personal responsibility?

LIGHT OF THE DAY CAMP

-Steve just wants to rack up the kidnapping count.

POLICE DEPARTMENT

-Andy is telling the truth about how crazy the town is, but who's the one who really looks crazy.

Not Bud. He looks cool as hell with that cigar.

STACKHOUSE HOUSE FOR WAYWARD TRAVELLERS

-I know we already know this, but Maryann is a crazy bitch.

LIGHT OF DAY CAMP

-Jason's cluelessness during the whole scene is endearing. "Who is them?" I think Ryan Kwanten wins MVP for this episode.

And my heart.

LAKE

-You couldn't really tell at night, but that is a damn fine looking lake.

-Sam accuses Daphne of being a whore. "It ain't whoring if you do it for love." I need that on a t-shirt.

-Daphne compares Sam to an ant and then a flea. I don't know about you, but I think an ant is cooler. 

-Supes are able to resists Maryann. Well then I mist be a supe.

Zing!

-Daphne keeps talking, but it still doesn't explain why Maryann wants Sam. Let's just sweep this under the plot rug!

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH BASEMENT

-Hugo is so not helping and his flashbacks show that he was the traitor. There are your 15 minutes buddy.

LAKE

-Maryann is a maenad. Now let's figure out how to kill her.

-Daphne says Bon Temps is full of crazy. Truer words people.

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHUCH BASEMENT

-Sookie's face says it all.

We're through with your bullshit Hugo.

-Hugo is basically a vamp sex addict. Sookie slaps him with the truth that even though he went to the Fellowship they're not bothering to help him. Suck it Hugo!

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH

-Sarah and Steve do the matching dress/tie combo again.

Fashionable assholes.

LIGHT OF DAY CAMP

-Jason calls Gabe "dick" brain. Good. He's gross.

MERLOTTE'S BAR AND GRILL

-"This shit is going faster than fritters at a fat farm."-I've missed you Lafayette!

And you're shirts!

-Arlene refers to Daphne as "Little Miss Employee of the Month". It's probably the nicest thing anybody has said about her. 

-Arlene considers "pulling out all the stops" as hot oils and "nasty" lingerie.

-I give True Blood props for only minimally making fun of a female raping a man. 

-"The first time in my goddamn life I ain't chasing after trouble and it just keep walking in my fucking door."

-Andy stumbles (is he doing any other verb?) into Merlottes and starts calling everybody zombies. This is my Emmy acceptance speech.

-It's wrong how attracted to concerned Sam that I am.

But it feels so right!

HOTEL CARMILLA

-Musical Moment of the Night: "Bleeding Love" by Leona Lewis. Plays during this whole scene. This version is by The Wombats though, because I like it more. 

-Hoyt got blood scented candles. They're perfect even if they smell like soup.

-Jessica tells Hoyt to take off his pants, which he does, but keeps the robe on. The staff loves these robes.

LIGHT OF DAY CAMP

-We get a Sarah shooting Jason fake out. Surprised it's not the cliffhanger.

LAKE

-Has Daphne been at that lake all day? Girl, you have a job!

-Eggs does us all a favour and stabs Daphne. 

"Wouldn't it be good if they finished each other off?"-Source

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH BASEMENT

-Gabe says that Sookie has made him look like an asshole. No the fact that you're trying to rape Sookie makes you an asshole, dick brain. 

HOTEL CARMILLA

-Bill's spidey sense is tingling! 

-Apparently German tourists are delicious. 

LORENA'S (OR IS IT BILL'S) FLASHBACK

-"You disgust me."-Amen.

-I hate these characters (obviously), but I believe this fight. 

-Bill calls Lorena the "saddest, loneliest creature". That has got to burn coming from Bill.

Apply ice to burn.

-Lorena releases Bill. I would have done that long ago.

HOTEL CARMILLA

-Barry comes to the rescue!...only to be kidnapped. It's a pretty major thing during this episode. Luckily Eric is there to save the day!

FELLOWSHIP OF THE SUN CHURCH BASEMENT

-Godric's there to save the day too!

Killing is also a major thing in this episode!

END

SPOILERS

-This isn't actually a spoiler, but Isabel says that she's curious to watch Hugo grow old. I've never really thought about the vampire side of why having a human lover would be sad, but this conversation makes me get it. Vampires can't grow old and have those experiences, but humans can. I just got a little bit angsty-er.

-The bleeds is a little bit of a big deal in this episode. It will be until season 7 then everyone is just like "la la la" when they're awake during the day. 

-Lilith gets mentioned by Daphne. You would think the writer's would learn how awful having a "god" in the plot is, but wait until season 5!

Home of the Nutty screencaps are where it's at.

Check this thing out on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr where an abridged version of the blog exists.

Leave a comment for my amusement!